"He wanted to see granny," said Bob.
"Let him," said the duke. "I don't; I want peace."
Titania sent down word that she would see him.
"Poor sad Penelope, poor mournful Penelope!" said Rivaulx. "Ha, but I will save her from further woe!"
He found Titania on a sofa, and he kissed her hand. This pleased poor Titania; it reminded her of her youth.
"Oh, marquis, I am in despair!" she cried.
"Despair not," said Rivaulx, as he stood up and smote his forehead, "despair not. All is not lost. But for me, I stand between two dreadful alternatives, and I have resolved to do my duty."
There was an air of tragedy about him that covered him like a robe. Titania shivered.
"What is it? What have you to tell me?"
"Ah, what!" cried Rivaulx. "But I shall do it. I shall do it at once, immediately, if not sooner, as your poet says."
"You won't kill any one, at least not here," shrieked Titania.
"Far from it," replied the marquis. "Oh, but it is terrible, for I have to smash, to break an oath. I swore not to reveal what I am about to reveal."
"Good heavens!" said Titania. "Oh, what? Is it—can it be—no—"
"Yes, yes," cried Rivaulx, "it is true; I own it!"
"Own what, marquis?"
He smote his breast and looked above her.
"I am the man!"
"Oh, what man?" squealed the duchess.
"I am the husband—and—and—the father," said Rivaulx, with a gulp, as if he were swallowing an apple whole.
"Of my Penelope?"
"Yes, yes," said the marquis. "Say nothing. It is a secret, full of oaths. Why, I know not, but she, the dear, insists, and what am I?"
Titania lay and gasped. The relief was tremendous. Three hours ago she would have refused to think of Rivaulx as Pen's husband. Now she welcomed the notion; she sighed and almost fainted. Rivaulx muttered strange things to himself.
"Can I announce it?"
"No," said the marquis, "it is a secret. But it is all right. I go."
"Take my blessing," said Titania. "Go to her quickly, poor dear, and implore her to let me come to her, and bid her tell all the world. What is her address?"
"I cannot give it," said Rivaulx, pallidly. "It is a secret. But I go, I hasten. Adieu, duchess; I am distracted. Oh, my mother and my country!"
He fled from the room, and, leaving his man to bring on his things, went away at an illegal speed toward London.
"Well, well," said Titania, with a gasp, "I cannot understand anything. But, after all, the marquis is a fine man and of a good family. I could almost sleep a little."
But just as she was composing herself to rest, Mr. Plant sent up word that he wished to see her for a few moments on urgent business before he went back to town.
"Let him come up," said the duchess. When Plant entered, he stood bolt upright in front of her, with a strange air of determination.
"I shall surprise you, I reckon," he said, in an American accent as thick as petrol fumes. "I know I shall."
"No, you won't," said Titania. "Nothing can surprise me now, I assure you."
"I shall surprise you, ma'am," said Plant, "and you'll have to own it. Prepare yourself and remember that what I tell you is in the nature of a secret. I can stand it no longer. I have to let it out. To hear Lady Penelope, whom I adore, spoken of as I do, makes my blood boil. She may have made some mistakes, but I've made some, too. I am going to surprise you—"
"No, you are not, Mr. Plant," said Titania.
"I—I am Lady Penelope's husband," said Plant, desperately, fixing his eyes on space.
"You are what?" shrieked Titania.
"Her husband—and—the parent of the announcement in the Times," said Plant, firmly.
"Am I mad?" asked Titania.
"No, but I am," said Plant, who was as pale as a traditional ghost. "I'm mad both ways. I want to kill."
"You mustn't," cried Titania, feebly. "I don't know where I am. What did you say? Oh, say it again!"
He said it again, and before she could say anything further, he rushed from the room and bounded down-stairs. She heard him turn his motor-car loose, and knew that in twenty seconds he was a mile away.
"What's wrong with everything, and me, and them?" asked Titania. "I wish I was a dairy-maid in a quiet farm, and had no relations. Am I mad? Did the marquis say it? Or did I dream it?"
Lord Bramber was announced.
"Oh, oh, oh!" said Titania. "Yes, I'll see him."
Bramber came in fuming, and, like the others, fixed his eyes over her head. He was nervous and abrupt.
"I can't stand any more, duchess," he began.
"I can't stand much," said Titania.
"It's a secret of course," said Bramber, "and I'm breaking my word!"
"Are you the husband of Penelope?" asked Titania.
"I—I am," replied Bramber, "and the cause, so to speak, of the notice in the Times."
"I thought so," said Titania. "Look at me, Ronald. Do I look mad? does my hair stand on end? do I seem wild and wandering?"
"No, of course not," said Bramber. "I'm telling you this because I feel I ought to. Now I'm going to her at once. This last news was rather unexpected, of course. Good-bye—"
"Stay!" shrieked Titania, but she was too late. Bramber was down-stairs and bounded into his motor-car and let her rip.
"What's the matter with everybody?" wailed Titania. "The marquis made me happy, but now I'm confused, very sadly confused, and I can't think she's married them all."
Gordon was announced, and in about three sentences he told her that, though the affair was a secret, he was Penelope's husband.
"I knew you were," said Titania. "When I heard you wanted to see me, I knew you were coming to say so. Oh, good-bye. Ask Lord Bradstock to send for a doctor. Good-bye, Mr. Gordon. Go now."
And Gordon went, just as De Vere came in.
"You have come to say you have married Penelope, I know," said Titania. "I feel sure you have."
"I have a heart for sorrow, for disgrace, for all things lovely. I—I am responsible for everything, even the Times," said De Vere, who was as pale as plaster.
"Leave me," said Titania. "Go and see her at once. Settle who it is. Go!"
And when he had gone, Carteret Williams and Carew came one after the other with the same confession. And she received them sadly, and appeared to wander. When the house was empty, she sent for Bradstock.
"Augustin, dear Augustin," she said, "you won't let them put me in an asylum. Have me taken care of at home, won't you? Don't let Goring give me cruel keepers. I am quite gentle and broken down!"
"I won't let anything beastly be done," said Bradstock. "But, my dear child, what's the matter?"
And Titania told him:
"By the Lord," said Bradstock, "they are damned good chaps! but where the devil are we?"
He went down-stairs when the doctor came and told everything to Goring. And Goring told Bob. For Titania forgot to mention to Augustin that all the husbands had insisted it was a dead secret.
"I say," said Bob, "of all the larks I've ever heard of, this takes the cake! I wonder what I ought to do. I think I'll ask Baker."
And he asked Baker. And in less than twenty-four hours the world knew all about it.